dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
