I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
is it fun? or sober?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
