So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
