is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
