Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I can't put those talents on a resume
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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