Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
