It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
