He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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