Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize