I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
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The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
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Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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