your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
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