You were right. It hurts to walk today.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
