Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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