i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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