You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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