Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
