im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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