ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
