apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
