carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
