that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
