No, you can still breathe under the balls.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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