Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize