Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
