i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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