Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize