Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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