I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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