I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
