let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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