Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
honey bunches of taint.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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