I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
