I just saw a hot homeless man
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
