What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Randomize
