I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
