Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Randomize
