I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
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Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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