I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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