hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
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