i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
