is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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