If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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