words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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