I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
