I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I need to align my fucking chakras
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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