Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize