I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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