I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
it glows. i had to have it.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
