can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize
