What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
